Sunday I was stoked to cross “#12: Find a church home.” off of the 25 by 25 list. But while, I was there making edits . . . I decided I felt ready to cross a few more off.
#11: Stop being afraid of commitment.
This 25 by 25 is directly related to #24 “Be open to being in a relationship.”
It takes someone who isn’t ready to be with someone else, who is a little topsy-turvy when it comes to relationships, to think that the fear of commitment and being open to a relationship deserve separate to-dos. Apparently I was still reeling from break-up world to think that those two things are remotely separate. Now that I’m in a perfectly awesome place, it’s incredulous to me. If you’re good with the idea of being in a relationship, you’re good with the idea of commitment.
When I crossed off #24, part of the work was figuring out what would be needed to be in a relationship. And when I made that list of sorts, I also took into consideration what I really need to make a long-term forever-kind-of commitment. The second I answered that question for #24, I technically answered #11’s commitment fear.
The answer? For me to be able to fully commit one day I have to have an incredible spiritual connection with someone.
My grandfather gave me some of the most cherished relationship advice that I have. When asked how him and my grandmother have stayed together all these years, he answered that early in their relationship when marriage started to be even an idea on the horizon they prayed together. Through prayer and God’s peace they both felt like they were then eventually led to be married. And any hard day later on when the goings were rough or they might have otherwise questioned the decision they made years ago, they always remembered the prayers. And were consequently reminded it wasn’t just their decision. It was God’s.
Talk about accountability.
If a man can’t pray with me, he can’t stay with me : )
In many ways, I can over simplify and say that. In other ways, it’s still more complicated. But I know one day that I’ll have a spiritual peace and connection with someone that will make the commitment part easy. But in the meantime, I am completely open to where my life is going to go with relationships. God’s got a plan, y’all.
#25: Apply for something outside of your comfort zone.
Okay, so I know I said it’s all on the line. And it still is. But this one I’m going to save as a secret. If I shared everything in the world here, that would leave little mystique. Let’s just rejoice that I’ve scratched this off of the list and I promise that there’ll be a big post one day if the application part actually turns into follow-through. Maybe it comes with a Bonjour? Or maybe it comes with an article appearing somewhere? Or maybe it comes with a medal? Or maybe it leads into more of that acting experience I mention somewhere else in the 25 by 25?
I’ll leave you with the mystery today and will one day post an update on what it was.
Only 10 months left and so much to do. Love it.
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